Traveling Madness

Christmas was great. Much fun was had. The most interesting part was the flight home. It went something like this:

We board the plane and have seats fairly close to the front. I'm happy. We put our bags into the overhead compartments and under our seats. That's 4 bags, 2 each. So this woman and her entire family come on board. Their seats are across from us. She stands in the middle of the aisle and starts complaining that the overhead compartment above her seat is full and she can't put her ONE TINY PURSE in it. Now, she has nothing under her seat. But she chooses to stand there, blocking other people from boarding, complaining that she doesn't have ANYWHERE to put her tiny purse.

So she settles in her seat finally, after giving up the purse argument. Her mother sits next to her in the aisle seat. She is coughing constantly. It's the most raspy, painful cough, originating deep within the recesses of her lungs. This was no cold or flu. This was straight up illness. It appears as though she can't fit the seatbelt around herself. She was a large woman. So the flight attendant tries to give her a seatbelt extension. She won't take it. She'd rather just not wear a seatbelt. After 10 minutes of arguing, she finally gives in. COUGH. COUGH.

So we're in the air and I notice that there is an almost constant sound of coughing and/or sneezing from all over the plane. I cannot count to 10 without hearing a cough or sneeze. So I try to concentrate on reading.

After a little under 2 hours, we come in for a landing. Just then the very rude flight attendant man runs down the aisle yelling "Miss, no, please return to your seat NOW." Apparently some woman's child got up and ran down the aisle as the plane was landing. Naturally, she went running after him. The stupid flight attendant man procedes to scold her after she returns to her seat. "It's dangerous for you to run up and down the aisle as we land. You need to be in your seat. It's very simple." All this was said in an extremely condescending manner. He then procedes to scold someone else in 1st class. What an ass!

So we finally land. B pulls our suitcases out of the overhead department, much to the dismay of the annoying lady who felt that this was her personal storage space. She says, "People should really stick to just 2 carry-ons" right at us. Just then, completely by accident, B drops the suitcase on this woman's foot. Seriously, it was an accident. Oh but what a happy accident it was. Then, her entire family stared at us and looked like they were ging to kick our asses. I have never exited a plane so fast. I swear, there was a trail of dirt behind us. We got off the plane without ever seeing those people again.

Oh, remember all those sneezing & coughing people? I have had a cold ever since that flight. I'm thinking Michael Jackson had a good idea with that surgical mask thing he wears.


BigDubb said...

Quite often air travel is credited with pandemic outbreaks of colds, and other ailments. -quote from an epidemioligist I work with.

so, needless to say, your ailment is not at all suprising.

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