Today I was picking berries in the yard in an effort to not let anything go to waste. I had just seen Food Inc. last night (if you haven't seen it you must) and was feeling the need to utilize what I have within reach. So, I grabbed the current issue of Real Simple (LOVE):
I'm taking Friday off, just for the hell of it. I can't wait! I have the following planned:
1. Facial/massage at a day spa. Awesome way to start the day.
2. Sidewalk sale at a handbag store 2 blocks from the day spa.
3. A little research at the local library. Apparently the front stairs of my house were featured in Sunset Magazine in either 1998 or 1999. I plan on digging through those archives until I find the article.
4. A little lunch. Maybe a local food cart or a salad from the garden.
5. Bike ride along the river.
6. Sitting my ass down on some grass and reading a book.
7. Seeing a movie.
Who will have the best day ever?
Pointing thumbs at self.
This girl!
Ever feel the need to get away and just figure stuff out? I've got a lot going on in my head these days. Things are stirring up in there like a pot of soup that's just about to boil over. Things like issues with my brother, an ailing uncle in another country, issues with friends, how I deal with people, letting people influence my decisions, and how the hell I'm going to sell my house. I need one of those retreats that writers take out in the mountains in a desolate cabin. Let's just hope I don't crash my car and find myself at Cathy Bates' house. Yikes!
Yesterday was my brother's birthday. I haven't seen him in 2 years. The last time we talked was the day after my birthday in 2008. I called him. He didn't seem to notice that he forgot my birthday the day before.
During his early 20s he made a lot of poor choices, and as a result, didn't have the best relationship with the parental units. I was always the in-between person who attempted to bridge the gap. My place in the family was the one who attempted to bring them together. This went on for years.
After I moved out of my parents' house he got married. He came to visit me once. From 1995 to, well, now, he has been to one of the 8 homes I have lived in. There were times when I lived in San Diego when I found out that he and his wife spent the weekend just 5 miles from me and never called. Basically he just didn't seem to make the effort anymore. But, since my job was to bridge the gap between him and my parents, I never said anything. I don't really know what happened.
Now, they are in the midst of coming out of a family feud with his wife's parents. Her dad was diagnosed with a terminal illness, which brought them out of the feud and got them to talk again. But, for some reason, now he makes no effort to talk to my parents. It's been so bad that they finally called him out on it. On his voicemail. As a result, there are no calls on Father's Day or Mother's Day or anybody's birthday.
Until about 3 months ago, I still had the will to fight for this. I saw what it did to my mom, how my dad secretly suffered inside through a situation he didn't fully understand. None of us really fully know why he's doing this. He's been called out on it a few years ago and completely acted like there was nothing wrong. He did the same when I talked to him last December.
Now, I am about to give up. I don't have it in me to fight anymore. I've been fighting since 1991. I'm done.
This past weekend I went camping for 4 days. I have decided that I am too old/spoiled to sleep in a tent. I found myself envying the people in their campers who were not getting rained on in the middle of the night because they had to go to the bathroom. I also found myself peeking into camper windows in an attempt to catch a glimpse of their TV. But, there were some great parts to it as well.
The Good
1. Camping breakfast - Nothing tastes/smells better.
2. Warm sleeping bag.
3. Properly functioning air mattress.
4. Round the fire drunken conversations with friends.
5. Camping dinner.
6. Campsites with nearby hot showers.
7. Campsites with decent bathrooms.
8. Walking to the beach everyday.
9. Watching your dog run freely on the beach.
10. Taking pictures of your dog passed out after a day of running on the beach.
11. 3 hour nap after returning home.
The Bad
1. Rain
2. Realizing that it's pouring outside while in a warm sleeping bag having to pee so bad it hurts.
3. Going out in the pouring rain to go to the bathroom.
4. Getting lost on the way back from the bathroom in the pouring rain.
5. Clothes that never really dry out.
6. Sand everywhere.
7. Dog almost getting eaten by a rottweiler.
8. Setting up a tent in the rain/dark.
All in all I had a great time. But I may have to start looking into getting a small camper.
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